Saturday, March 24, 2007

Ok. It was bad enough that you joined up with the Black Eyed Peas and turned them into a hip hop bebop wannabe techno dance spaz band, but now your songs are all over the damn place.

I hate them. I hate their addictive melodies and shitty rhymes that easily get stuck in your head. But most of all, I hate that you spell out words in your songs. Did you recently learn to spell? Are you mentally retarded? Are you trying to tell the world that you finally know how to spell your nickname or the word "glamorous?” Heaven forbid you actually produce a song with substance. I mean your songs are about being a materialist hoebag. Congratulations. You're selling the oldest profession in the book. Can you do anything else? You and every other moronic pop star out there have the same rehashed bullshit songs.

As if that wasn't enough, you look like a man. I know you'll disagree, but honestly, if you have to practically perform reconstructive surgery to make yourself look like a WOman, then you are a man.

So please, for the love of humanity and the remaining shards of dignity in the world, disappear. D to the I to the S A P P E to the A and R … and don't return.

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